The Day After, Election Edition

a blog by La Kifo

I would like to apologize for the radio silence on this side of the Pacific. I have been busy. Surprising right? But there are better things to do in life than sit behind a laptop and spew a diarrhea like paste of bullshit from my asshole to Facebook. 

I know, some of you guys need me. You need me to tell you who to make fun of and generally how to feel. So, I would like to inform my minuscule masses that, y'all need to shut the fuck up. 

If millennials were responsible for all the decisions in this country we'd force male pornstars to wear condoms, sarcasm/comedy wouldn't exist, and the world would genuinely be sucked of any substance or orginality. I don't know about you, but when I watch porn, I really like to get transported into the scene. The dialogue catches me, but as soon as I see a condom, all I can think about is, "that guy definitely does not want to keep that on" or "This guy definitely has got the skills to pull out, without a single man left behind". 

YO, YOU ARE WHITE, SO WHO THE FUCK ARE YOU TALKING TO?!?!?!? We seem to be extremely butt hurt over here on the left. You know, we held a election. We asked all that are eligible to participate, we asked them who they believe should be the next leader of this country, and those eligible voters decided who that would be. I don't really think any one person has the authority or right to decide who the President actually is. Sorry, the person you thought was going to win didn't but that doesn't mean you get to singularly decide who is the President/who isn't.

Now, I don't want to get to deep into this because we got a few more of these coming down the pipe but I wholeheartedly blame whatever people thought went wrong with the election on Stephen Colbert and Jon Stewart. It is the first election that Facebook didn't get their way, and it is also the first election that Stephen Colbert and Jon Stewart didn't have shows on Comedy Central.

Ahhhh, the immortal, what do you tell the children, line. I love this line, it is one that will never die and one that never work on me. I hate children. I don't care what you tell the children. Fuck the children, don't tell them anything. Better yet, tell them we held an election between a shrew and a shrew, and the shrew with a wig won. 

As for the second post, I would exercise your right to learn the English language more gooder. I believe if you catch yourself writing something incorrect, it is proper to simply delete the incorrect letters as opposed to just stating you made a mistake and continuing. Jeez, this fucking generation, they are so lazy it kills me, it kills me peeps, it kills.

Personally, I would have to disagree. I think a lot of aspects are extremely funny. Maybe the fact that an entire section of people have attacked, insulted, and marginalized an entire group of people based on a list of things one person said. That is pretty funny. It is also pretty funny that all these white, straight, christian Facebook users keep posting shit like that notepad screenshot. I am more things on that list than anyone whose posted that type of message, which was a lot of people. 

And as for the post on the bottom.... are you fucking kidding me. 

Let us think for a second. What was the consequence of this online politically correct bully society that millennials and idiots alike created?  

How much do they need? Would it be better if I just paid for their executive penthouse apartments overlooking downtown Manhattan in advance? Why don't I just give them my social security number, that way they won't have a problem scamming me for the rest of my life.

Yea, I didn't even copy and paste the entire post. I really could care less about this one.

Here's another one. If I wanted to be represented by a straight white christian person then I would have voted for Trump, get the fuck out of here with your phony outrage, back seat activist bullshit. It does nothing and it means nothing. 

Yo, bro if you want a signature, you can cop one on Amazon for $14.89, there is no need for this dick sucking bullshit. It really concerns me that there is this many people in my outer circle of Facebook who are trying to totally misrepresent me and rest of the 'disenfranchised', 'fucked', 'scared' community. 

On a serious note, can white people fuck off? Really, stop trying to fight battles for other people, stop feeling bad for slavery and the thousands of human rights violations you've committed over the years. It's annoying, YOUR THOUGHTS (on this topic) ARE NOT ORIGINAL, if this blog and only the few examples of parody between all of you, is not convincing then there is no hope for you. 

If you're reading this right now, you are probably white. So heed my warning, because sooner or later you will wake up in a world full of color that is sick of you and you're bullshit.