"Phoenixes burst into flame when it is time for them to die and are reborn from the ashes.” - Dumbledore, the first gay wizard.
First let me start with this little tidbit. Harry Potter SUCKS. Despite what Dumbledore has done in the realm of homosexual and transgender wizardy rights, there is nothing to like about Harry fuckin Potter. The only way I wont completely lose respect for someone who happens to be a Potter fan is if they are either a small child or they are blind and deaf.
Do not get me wrong I, like every intelligent being on this planet, am a large Game of Thrones fan. Anyone who wants to debate Harry Potter v. GOT, can go fuck themselves.
But I digress, let me introduce myself formally. I am the savior, the deity. Something beautiful is born in the ashes of defeat. I am here to fill the void left by other members of my community. Someone needs to enter the ring and hold one finger high for everyone else to follow. As many people across country are aware that the 2015-2016 New England Patriots were murdered this past Sunday. A small dagger in the form of a missed PAT attempt by Stephen Gostkowski late in the first quarter.
No doubt about it, that missed PAT murdered the Patriots. It was a small wound that for most of the game hung over the Patriots heads as they down by 8 points for most of the game. There were many aspects of the Patriots play that ultimately led to their death, the horrendous offensive line play, the inability of the Wide Receivers to separate from coverage, mismanagement of 3rd AND 4th down on offense, the anemic status of the running attack. As I listed all the problems that led to Pats demise, it is easy to notice that every problem the Patriots had was on the offensive side of the ball.
The defense balled out. As they have done all year, they absolutely shut down the Broncos offense. Even the first drive from the Broncos, which turned out to be by far the best compilation of plays and execution they had all game, the Pats defense made Peyton Manning work to convert two 3rd and longs. Ultimately Manning found Owen Daniels on 21 yard touchdown pass. If you re-watch that play Owen Daniels takes advantage of a blown coverage by Rob Ninkovich and Jamie Collins with an exceptional double move on his route. It is hard to tell who fucked up their assignment on that play. The Patriots were in a Cover 2 zone. When you take that into account and look at the positioning of the two players, Collins is the culprit. Collins bit when Daniels made a quick hesitation faking a drag route across the middle of the field. Manning then lobbed a lollipoop pass over a trailing Jamie Collins as Daniels essentially walked into the end zone. In the Cover 2 zone Collins is one of the middle linebackers making him responsible for the gap created by the two safeties splitting the deep part of the field. His job on the play was most likely to keep receivers in front of him. That means coming hard up field to smash a drag or curl route and MORE importantly to cover the gap created in the center of the field by the two safeties. Collins bites way to early on the double move and thus opens the middle of the field to Manning. Upon seeing this play and the prior two 3rd down conversions I was fuming. Way too easy, the Broncos seemingly jogged down the field and into the end zone on pass that I could have made. I'm 5'6 145 lbs wet, and I could have hit Owen Daniels on that play. Nevermind the fact that many of the players on the O-line are nearly a foot taller then me.
The tape speaks for itself, Peyton Manning now and forever is by far the most overrated quarterback in NFL history. But that's a blog for a different day. Probably two weeks from now when he shits in his hand on Super Bowl Sunday in San Fran.
I don't wanna get too carried away here bitching about the Patriots loss. The purpose of this blog is to let fans know that there is a tomorrow. While I and most of the world obviously would have wanted to see Tom Brady cuckolding Roger Goodell there is a silver lining, a phoenix rising if you will. Even for us Patriots Fans. And that happens to be my all-american pastime, poo poo Peyton Manning in the big game. I find greater joy in watching Peyton Manning and his stupid tarmac forehead permanently frozen in carbonite with that "who stole my milk?" look on his face than I do in my own life. Sad right? At least I don't work at ESPN as a on air personality.
Is this even a question? The Carolina Panthers are one of the greatest teams we have seen in the past 5-7 years. The Broncos are possibly the worst offense to make to the Super Bowl since the 2000 Baltimore Ravens or the 2006 Chicago Bears. Comparing them to 2000 Ravens would be a compliment for Manning and the Broncos.
Everyone. Be Calm. Be Cool. The Patriots and rest of the NFL underbelly we will be back in a short 6 months. Teams will be back at OTA's before you know it. I will have much more to do by then. I'll probably be in a teen tit film like the guy who played Horatio, mix in a little world domination and fuck loads of dolla dolla bills.
Make America Burn Again 2016
PS. I know I suck at photoshop or whatever the fuck its called but I do not care enough to spend more then 5-10 minutes making shit like this.
PS-PS. I 100% spent more then 10 minutes on that.
PS-PS-PS. I wrote the first PS before i was done making the photo
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