Lime Chips

a blog by Kifo

I love chips.

I also happen to love lime.

I could eat chips any time just like I could suck on a nice juicy dick... lime... any day of the week. When I was a child, a flamboyant boy, and was introduced to Tostitos Lime Flavored chips, I applied for a job in the same super market that I found them in. 

Now, over the years, I have tasted many a chip and lime. Name a lime, I've had it. The same could be said for the chips my throat has swallowed. What I have learned over my long years of service, happens to tell me that Tostitos are by and large the worst quality tortilla chip brand out there, but oddly enough, I could never find anything comparable to their Lime flavored chip. 

I've had better chip, I've had better lime. Yet no one combines the two like Tostitos. Plenty of times, large masses have asked me, "Why don't you just make your own lime flavored chip?" and the answer to that question is who are you and who the fuck do you think you are? 

That is not how life works. In life, you deal with cards you are dealt. If God gives you bad quality chip/lime combinations, you sit there and thank the man for even thinking that putting a chip with a lime would be a good idea. I don't think I need to break down the math of God and Lime Flavored Tostitos chips, but my point stands. The amount of effort required to do such a thing, is a bit aggressive. Besides, if God wanted me to make my own lime flavored chips, he would have put tortillas and limes in my super market. Not copious amounts of crates filled with bags of Lime Flavored Tostitos. 

I don't want to put all the blame or credit on God, because he's got plenty of other stuff to talk to the media about on Tuesday. The main aspect of creating anything by yourself is, again, the effort. Do you think one person, some day, just randomly thought about putting lime with chip? One Person? All by himself? 

Of Course Fucking Not. That's why we need God and Corporations. How else would we invent menial modifications upon non-nutritious food? Do you think one guy invented the Telephone? How about the theory of relativity? Are either of those things singular ideas stemming from one historical figure? How about the Earth? Do you think that the Earth that was invented by one guy? Who was the single creator behind the Rockefeller Transcontinental Railroad? What about the song 'Life on Mars'? Is it really possible that a single person created such a work of art? 

God giveth and god taketh. It is as simple as that. I don't question it, I don't ever question the fact that a floating blimp person is moving around in the sky constantly making sure I am doing the right thing. Not to mention, this blimp person is not only monitoring my behavior, but everyone's behavior whom happens to praise his name. Would you question your community leader if you saw him head into the same side of the confession booth as a 8 year old child? I don't, because I believe in God. 

And if there ever was one, or ever a time to smite someone down for insubordination it would be right now. I don't wanna point fingers but I am sitting next to one... just kinda waiting on you dude...