Chipotle is trying to Kill us and I feel fine

a blog by La Kifo

The most recent trail of incidents involving mega fast food chain Chipotle and the well being of its customers.

CBS:
An Indianapolis man who was still in his car when a heavy Chipotle sign fell and crushed it says he now realizes how close he came to being killed, reports CBS Indianapolis station WTTV.

"I was extremely lucky, man," Mike Ford said. "The timing, I think, really helped me."

Ford says he had just parked his Honda Accord at the Chipotle restaurant on Saturday afternoon. At the time, strong winds were causing damage and power outages across central Indiana.

Ford says he was leaning over to get out of the car when the sign came crashing down.

First there was that e-coli thing that happened. Chipotle shut down all of their branches to train their employees on cleaning or some shit like that. And that wasnt the first time Chipotle had an outbreak of e-coli in their restaurants. 

Now this shit. God damn, Chipotle. 

I love Chipotle, if I had no self respect I would eat Chipotle 5 days a week. As it turns out I do. But that doesnt stop me from eating Chipotle once or twice a week, or whenever I can. 

So I really do not know how to process this story. On one hand there is nothing better than a burrito bowl with chips and sour cream on the side. 

I could really use a burrito bowl right about now, BUT they are trying to murder every last one of us. How else do you explain flimsy signs, and multiple outbreaks of e-coli. AND when I texted chipotle HQ to get my free burrito because of this huge mess, they flat out denied me. Things would be sitting differently if I had just gotten that free burrito. I feel like my whole life would be different if I just got that burrito. 

I might have had an family of my own. Maybe I find the dankest of the dank on my way home from that burrito. Who knows what would change, it would be something though.