a book Written by 50 Cent was used in a Missouri Filibuster

a blog by La Kifo

The fact that filibusters are a thing is mind bottling. The government allows people to fill time by spewing bullshit but none of my professors do.

Associated Press:

The Missouri Senate has tabled a sales tax proposal after a senator filibustered it by reading a book about 50 Cent.

Democratic Sen. Maria Chappelle-Nadal on Monday read for almost an hour from "The 50th Law," a self-help book co-authored by 50 Cent and Robert Greene that draws on anecdotes from the rapper's life.

Chappelle-Nadal opposes a plan to would allow unincorporated areas of St. Louis County to vote on a sales tax to fund law enforcement. She says the county's government should not see additional funding until it addresses a number of issues. That includes the way law enforcement responded to protests in Ferguson following the fatal police shooting of 18-year-old Michael Brown.

The House passed a similar bill 123-24 later Monday. That bill now heads to the Senate.

I don't know about you guys, but I think I would rather have seen the Patton Oswalt episode 7. A three franchise tie? Talk about a money maker.

Anyway this is why I hate the government. A Institution such as the Missouri Senate can have somebody stand up during a presentation and pull shit out of their ass, but whenever I forget to prepare a presentation I get a fierce tongue lashing and no credit. What the fuck kind of reverse logic is this?

Both of these institutions are state funded, yet it seems like they play by their own rules. On top of that, technically people get paid to sit through this. Why do I have to pay someone to read their fan fiction but I can't fake a presentation without getting screwed?

Putting all that aside, this is a veteran move by Senator Maria Chappelle-Nadal. To really be successful in the filibuster game, you have to break out something that will bore your opponent so much that they forget what they are doing. What can you say is more boring, yawn inducing than a book written by 50 Cent? The guy can't even speak English correctly. 

What this does present, is a unique business opportunity for Fifty. Start a book franchise solely dedicated for filibustering.

Think about it. There is literally no market for such books. Imagine a book whose sole design is to put your enemies to sleep.

Not only could he sell this for filibustering purposes, he could also sell them to the FBI, CIA, and the military for use in torture tactics. We all know how much we love to torture people, and if you don't know or like torture, ya might wanna find another country to live in, Merica'. 

Listening to the rantings and ravings of a High School dropout ex-con is maddening. Ask anyone who has met Steven Seagal. The only thing worse than an idiot, is an idiot with a plan. 

I think the Dali Lama said that once.